If you could have any superpower, what would it be? Would you choose the power of flight? To read people’s minds? To look fabulous in skinny jeans? To be indestructible?
I unfortunately can’t help you with the first three, but that last one – being indestructible – is totally possible. Being indestructible means having an undefeated mind, one that faces adversity calmly and rebounds from it confidently. It means getting up each day, each week, each month to attack the obstacles that stand before us again and again. That’s a pretty cool superpower, right?
Disclaimer: being indestructible does not mean that you won’t ever feel despair or discouraged (this is life that we are talking about here, after all…), but it does mean that you will continue on despite those feelings. You can’t control what happens to you in life, but you certainly can control the amount of suffering it brings.
Resilience isn’t like freckles or brown hair or blue eyes – you aren’t born with it. It’s like killer abs or Michelle Obama arms – you have to work for it (but luckily, it’s a lot easier to achieve!).
All Problems are Solvable
It may not always seem like it, but it’s true. The solution may not always be what you want, but it is always there. Once you understand that premise, you can start obtaining benefits from adversity and better understand the real meaning of victory.
Find Your Mission
What really makes you tick? Is it helping other people, making them laugh or teaching others? Whatever it is, identify it and commit to it. This will give you a sense of purpose that will guide you through the toughest moments in life.
Make a Vow
Say it out loud: I resolve to identify obstacles and overcome them. I will soldier on and make use of the anxiety of uncertainty, negative thoughts and adversity (repeat as necessary!).
Appreciate the Good
There is something to be grateful for every single day, even on the worst day of your life. If you can’t find something good, be thankful for the obstacles themselves. They are teaching you something that will make you stronger.
Flexibility is essential to becoming indestructible. When you become more adaptable, you are better ready to respond when life crises arise. Instead of being crushed by changes, use them as an opportunity to branch out in different directions, adapt and thrive.
Keep Things in Perspective
All aspects of your life can be colored when something bad happens. When bad stuff strikes, it seems like every little thing is amplified, and if you aren’t careful, the result could be losing it at the barista who put too much foam on your latte. To the innocent bystanders who happen to be in your way, it may sound like you are screaming about your drink, but what you are really yelling about is your terrible boss, the bad news you got yesterday, your teenager’s attitude and every other thing bothering you lately. Keeping it all in perspective is the best way to build resilience, stop even one bad thing from tainting your view of other parts of your life, and avoid blowing up again at the poor barista (you owe her a big tip next time!!).